Many of my friends will have heard me speak of my friends "The Johns". Well, one of them - John Hencher - died this afternoon in hospital in Hereford. He and "Little" John (Cupper) had been a couple for 43 years since they first met on Whit Monday 1968. I started work in January 1969 and met John Cupper at Kidderminster College. Soon I was invited to supper with them in their home at a Stourbridge Vicarage. We had eggs and gammon in the vicarage kitchen with dog Jesse very present in their lives.
After Stourbridge, they lived in a tiny lodge one roomed house at Ombersley (where John had been born in the stables, no comment), at Salperton in the Cotswolds then in Herefordshire until now.
My life was fundamentally changed by meeting the two of them. They were the first gay couple living an open, honest life I had ever met. This was very rare at the time. The Johns and I have been friends ever since - 42 years. For the last 18 months John Hencher has been cared for at their home, a fifteenth century priest's house in a hamlet in Herefordshire, by John Cupper, their friends and a team of carers.
John resigned his priest's orders some years ago, in disgust at the homonegativity of the Church of England and embraced the Society of Friends where he felt very welcome. He was the very best kind of Christian: polymathic, a character from Shakespeare - think Hamlet, Falstaff and Lear plus John Keats all in one person, deeply spiritual, bawdy, but never really offending, controlling, generous beyond generous beyond generous, the best of friends. He changed others' lives, the Johns' changed other people's lives. Paul and I always felt cherished by him. May he rest in peace. His spirit lives on.
So sorry to hear about John H. I only met them a few times, and they were lovely. They were an inspiration to me as well - a kind of beacon of stability when such things were indeed rare.
ReplyDeleteAnd I loved them on Treasure Hunt as well !
Peter xx
Dear Peter, Thanks for the prompt about TH. JC told me they were watching it only last week. What you say about inspirational is spot on. bx
ReplyDeleteJohn Hencher bought Amblecote to the national and international news when he inadvertantly advertised for a wife. The nations press descended on us. My father owned the newsagents opposite Henchers Georgian vicarage and did a roaring trade selling a wide range of refreshments to the world's press. As an impressionable sixth former I remember enjoying every minute of the episode. Needless to say John Hencher had gone to ground and did not reappear until the reporters had tired of their vigil. He was a much loved and respected vicar who invariably strode around his parish in a full length cloak and matching hood. The locals called him the Sandeman Port Man.He was elected to the local council and immersed himself in every part of village life.Perhaps a loose cannon and a man whose response to a situation could never be anticipated but nevertheless a kind and Christian man rembered with fondness by his parishioners in Amblecote
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ReplyDeleteJohn Hencher preached brilliantly once right before I left for college and also taught me in confirmation class. I found him a kind, inclusive priest and I am very grateful for his time at Pershore Abbey.
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